10 REAL signs that you are ready to Get Engaged

10 Real Signs You Are Ready To Get Engaged

1: You trust them to want the best for you

This one seems so small but is a foundation, pretty large. You trust your partner to treat you right, to want the best for your heart and mind and soul. You want them to trust you the same way. 

2: You already see it in your life story

When you think about your future, your partner is always by your side. They are an integral part of your dreams and aspirations. If you can’t envision a life without them, it’s a clear sign that you’re in it deep already. This may be a big green flag you’re already committed to doing the hard work of being committed.

3: You are comfortable with the highs & lows, and it’s not toxic

You and your partner have weathered storms together and come out stronger, so you’ve learned to trust them. You do hard work of emotionally understanding and supporting each other. This is really less of an emotion, more of a personal decision that you will love during the highs and lows of what life brings. You and your partner have grown together, supporting each other’s personal development and embracing change, and that shows your ability to adapt and thrive as a couple. Your conflicts aren’t toxic, they don’t get nasty.

4: You are yourself when they’re around

They’re your best bud. You can be silly, vulnerable, and unapologetically yourselves! This is a glimmering sign that your chemistry mix is fire. When you find that you can let down your guard, be imperfect, and still feel loved and supported – that’s golden.

5: You feel emotionally encouraged & physically safe

You enjoy each other even when things are blue and skies are gray. You can handle their quirks well. You can take your concerns and feelings to each other without fear of a negative response. Your partner is a safe place to fall, and you’re catching them as they fall. You fill each other’s cups up, not causing drainage holes. You know that when something amazing happens and they’re the first person you want to share your joy with, because they’ll share in your joy and make it feel more amazing, and that’s the good stuff.

You make each other’s surroundings feel secure just by being there, you care about how they feel on the inside, you ask each other deep questions to grasp who you truly are and answer without fear.

Your partner doesn't harm you or keep you down physically or emotionally, and you feel no drive to harm them even when you’re most angry. Owning up to your own stuff and apologizing is mutual standard practice.

6: Your values line up nicely

Shared values and goals are the foundation of a successful partnership. You’ve discussed and align on topics such as (if applicable): Spiritual Beliefs, Honesty, Responsibility/Work Ethics, Compassion, Respect for strangers, Fairness, Wisdom, Integrity, Loyalty, Finances, Communication Styles, Parenting Styles, Political foundation, Boundaries with families/friends, Ambitions for the future, etc. If you align, it may be time. I made a rhyme.

You find yourselves both in equal interest conversations about a some-day Honeymoon, Rings, Vows, Outfits, Ceremony, Living Space, etc. That whole equal interest thing is key to feeling that it might be time! If children are involved or have been discussed in the future, you agree on where you stand. You are both equally on board with the idea of commitment.

7: You notice you are feeling hopeful and readyish

You are feeling some kind of way about what could be. Feeling a sense of readiness and excitement about taking the next step in your relationship is a pretty glaring sign that it may be time. If you’re eager to start a new chapter of your love story and embrace the commitment of marriage, trust your instincts.

8: They make you feel that being single is not your thing

You feel the desire for a partner, a deep connection that is unique and enchants your shared life. You have your reasons that committing to your partner long term is better for your wellness and happiness than being single. You notice you are personally benefited by having a partner in your life. Your partner isn’t perfect, no one is, but you really really like this whole being-together-a-lot thing. You would much rather have each other than be separated.

9: Boundaries are understood to be healthy and mutually respected

We are individuals, so although we are a “we”, boundaries are a way you love each other. 

"In healthy relationships, both people have healthy self-esteem and are able to both be vulnerable and assert their boundaries. They feel free to think, feel, and act independently." - BetterUp Article

E.g. Healthy boundaries about what level of personal responsibility you have for each other’s emotions and healing should be discussed. You cannot hold each other up if you’re too entwined to ever be the strong one.

10: It's true - When you know you know

Sometimes you meet someone and you just know this is my person. You hear about people saying love at first sight was real for them, or they just knew the moment lalala. In reality, it is often more of an slow onset of deep set belief that you will be together and it continues to just feel right. They feel like a gift and precious to you, like your heart grew in a new way. Jealousy doesn’t mean much, that could be mere ego. Lean into your deeper instincts about this person… WYKYK.